Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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