I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
