watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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