I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Randomize
