I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
It's Friday. Sex?
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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