it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
