i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
it glows. i had to have it.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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