And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
