You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
