CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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