the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
