The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
