you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
