you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
