im so drunk with asians
where?
always
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
In other news, I just burned my penis
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
