I hate all girls vehemently.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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