I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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