the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
