Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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