before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
