i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize