apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
