why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
