dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
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