yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
