Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize