I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
