I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
