We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
