More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
