so explain again why im purple
no
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
