i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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