I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
