As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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