nut hugger
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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