i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
