after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
