Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
