yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
