I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
