My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
