hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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