put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
