had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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