is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
