that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
