Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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