My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
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