how can u be prego again
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
