Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
