Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Slut skills are useful in every country.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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